The season is upon us! This time we will look at my personal top ten favorite sweets as seen in video games. Not all of them are from halloween inspired games though imagining each of these on a single buffet table would be something else. The thumbnail is unrelated I assure you,
As the classically reposted Twitter thread goes: “Why does anime food look so good”, which is then followed by a series of gifs from the posters favorite series which really only serves to garner clicks every once in a while on a website that thrives on reposted content and jokes that will be buried so far into the ground Junji Ito would write a claustrophobic manga on them. On a completely unrelated topic, up next on our October escapades will be a discussion and dissection of my personal favorite candies and sweets in video games. Here I will discuss which foods would be the ideal snack for a spooky October night. Unlike those threads…In no particular order
10. Snackoos (Ace Attorney)
Ema Skye, the spunky forensic analyst of the Ace Attorney series, will often be seen eating a bag of these chips at an alarming rate. It’s so prevalent to her character, her crippling Snackoo addiction is integrated into her 3D models! These chips are often a footnote whenever Ema is “on screen” though are still important to her character arc, probably. What are we missing out on in these chips, I wonder? The world may never know, not unless capcom ups their merchandising game for Ace Attorney 7! (please?)
9. Poffin (Pokemon)
I have great memories of making these things in Diamond and Pearl, but the mind tends to wander; what are we as the trainers missing out on? The shape and the fact it rises reminds me of a brioche bread used to stuff with ice cream for a light and fluffy, carb loaded piece of heaven. Pokemon in universe were known to share many attributes with their human trainers, I imagine not being limited to certain foods as well. Well, if it makes my imaginary ones and zeroes happy, it deserves a spot on a list.
8 Gooigi (Luigi’s Mansion 3)
“This isn’t a food”! “No, it can’t be!” you say. Yes, well Gooigi is very much just a gelatinous mass of the real green goof. Game dev Kensuke Tanabe confirmed Gooigi “might taste like coffee” and appears to have the consistency of a light gelatin. Coffee jelly isn’t unheard of as a dessert treat, so Gooigi might double as a handy doppelganger as well as an extraneous food source in a pinch. Let’s hope the Poltergust won’t come with a spoon in the next instalment.
7. Honey-Caramel-Banana-Chocolate Donut (Tokyo Mirage sessions)
There is a certain sidequest in the excellent Tokyo Mirage Sessions (seriously, go play it) that involves giving virtual idol Tiki a donut she heard about from a nearby passerby. A sugary, momentous, too-long-of-a-name beast known as the Honey-Caramel-Banana-Chocolate Donut. From the in game model, it appeals to be just an average though extremely loaded sweet. Seriously, that name alone could serve as your sugar intake for the day. At the end of the quest, it’s revealed poor Tiki can’t even hold or eat the thing as in incorporeal form won’t allow it. I would sacrifice my diet just to try this creature in her honor.
6. Invincible Candy (Kirby)
Speaking of a sugar high, the Invincible Candy from Kirby is possibly the most straight forward naming convention ever. You eat it, you become on such a manic sugar rush you barrel though friends and foes alike, you relax. Like an overstimulating Comic Con, this candy promises to be dazzling, hyper, and perfectly decadent for the Halloween season. Kirby has had no adverse effects, so it’s probably fine. Not all of us are born with an all-encompassing maw though, kirby must just be built different.
5. Wumpa Fruit (Crash Bandicoot)
It is a time honored tradition for annual sugar-seekers to end up with the occasional apple in their bags. Growing older, I’ve begun to appreciate them though. They’re more expensive than your average chocolate, will keep you full for longer, and can be taken home to make even more snacks. But it’s just! Not! Candy! Wumpa fruit could possibly be a sweeter or possibly gummy take on the standard fruit, and for being the coin replacement in Crash Bandicoot they must be something good! Besides, they’re never referred to as “apples” or an equivalent anyway so it’s probably different. There, that’s my healthy entry for the list.
4. Monster Cake (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild)
Breath of the Wild is home to a variety of unique foods, from Crab pilaf right down to the common fruitcake. One that stands out to me is the monster subcategory of foods. By combining monster extract with wheat or various meats, Link can produce decently filling concoctions that all have these great designs that would be perfect for Halloween. The cake in particular is created by mixing cane sugar, goat butter, monster extract, and Tabantha wheat (If you can’t slay monsters of their essence for cooking, store bought is fine). Thesee cakes have what places them above average sweet; flair!
3. Snail Pie (Undertale)
Playing Undertale normally will yield a delicious Butterscotch pie at this point in the game. If you’re playing on hard mode though, this will be replaced by a Snail Pie instead. Make no mistake, this pie has all the same attributes but differs in name only. Perhaps the name only refers to the shape of the pie and not the ingredients? Frisk doesn’t seem to mind either way, and eating an actual snail pie mid-battle rather than the butterscotch one seems more effective towards establishing dominance on your foes so there’s a tactical advantage as well. This spooky buffet could use some varied flavors, so why not!
2. Sea Salt Ice Cream (Kingdom Hearts)
As seen in the Kingdom Hearts series, Sea Salt ice cream is a favorite of Axel, Roxas and Xion as they deal with crippling existentialism while also eating sweets (as millennials do). The ice cream is nothing special, though the contrast of salty and sweet is reminiscent of using syrup on pancakes to open your culinary third eye. The mix reminds me of summer, with maybe a hit of sadness that these character’s languid days would soon be over. Or it could just be ice cream. With Nomura, who knows?
1. Missingo. (Pokemon)
Ok, hear me out. As per the schoolyard legends, we still have no idea what Missingno, the infamous glitch from Pokemon Red & Blue, could be. We know now it’s merely a sprite error that is a result of those brave little cartridges trying their damndest, but the legends supersede the truth. Considering we already had the jelly personification of Luigi earlier in the list, I’d say Missingno is par for the (main) course. Imagine serving up Missingno and going “Yeah sure i’ll have a slice of that @I@*#*I*I#IUIRI*#*IRI(#*(@*(#*@ thanks”. Hey, its Halloween. Anything can happen.